I Hate My Mother With a Passion I Do Not Understand. What’s Wrong With Me?

*Quora Question**

Photo by Simone Secci on Unsplash

I don’t think anything is wrong with you. We’re all human and like you, it sounds like your mother has messed up along the way. We all have our faults. Maybe we should break this down and see where all the anger is coming from because if you don’t understand it, how can you be sure you hate her?

Hate is to be truly disgusted while passion is barely being able to control your emotions. You didn’t explain why you hated your mother but let’s say she was the most horrible person. Have you ever heard the quote, “anger is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will die?” You hugging that anger whenever it arises is like you drinking that poison.

Parenting doesn’t come with rule books. Its on-the-job training and once you get older she may tell you she was doing the best she could. But you were there, you remember how it went down whether she does or not, it’s up to you whether to keep drinking the poison. Even if she calls it sacrificing or doing it for you and you knew it was her being selfish and unaccountable, its up to us to make peace with it. People are going to be who they are and you don’t have to allow yourself to stay in toxic situations. You can always love her from a distance and the phone if she has one.